But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
