I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
