He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize