Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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