Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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