everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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