He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
