like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Randomize
