I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Randomize
