Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
