okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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