You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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