I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
