i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
