she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
