Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
