this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh�
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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