Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
