that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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