so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Randomize
