I like to think it a success when the cops are called
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
