i just made my gag reflex go away.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize
