i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
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