whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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