just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
