i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
