escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
