dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
