and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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