Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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