When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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