So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
