she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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