dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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