I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize