Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
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