It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize