At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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