is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
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