the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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