And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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