Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
