I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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