he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
