i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
