I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize