What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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