Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
