I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
did i walk over a car last night?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
