I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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